First off, I want to make it apparent that this letter is in no way, shape, or form, a compliment to you in any way. This thank you letter doesn’t discount the fact that you are scum on this earth, and deserve to rot in hell for all of the lives that you have ruined. Even though I could sit here and write this entire post cursing your name..I think I’ve done enough of that. You may have taken a few pieces of my spine and made me miss almost an entire year of college, but here is a list of the reasons why you have changed my life in so many positive ways while I proceeded to kick your ass…
Thank you for…
- letting me throw away all my razors.
- allowing me to consistently experience the hidden kindness of strangers.
- showing me the true meaning of community.
- creating an indescribable bond in my family.
- teaching me what it means to be a reliable medical practitioner.
- making my Mom and I live in Baltimore and experience their amazing calamari.
- challenging my patience.
- forcing me to be confident in the person I am.
- saving me money on hair supplies.
- highlighting the value of friendship.
- teaching me how to be there for someone who has to deal with you.
- making me relate to the elderly population while using my grandma’s walker for a month.
- reminding me to appreciate the little things in life.
- making me a germaphobe.
- giving me the opportunity to impact other lives.
- making my skin softer than a baby’s bottom.
- reminding me that things could always be worse.
- giving me the opportunity to help other families whose lives are screwed up by you.
- giving me the confidence to write these blogs.
- solidifying my passion to give back to the medical field.
- reminding me that humor truly is the best medicine.
- making parents teach their children that they shouldn’t yell… “MOMMY SHE HAS NO HAIR” in public. 🙂
- letting me catch up on my Netflix shows.
- strengthening my makeup skills.
- putting me on national television.
- allowing me to contribute to research..so that one day you’ll finally disappear.
- making me look like an emoji.
- reminding me that this world is a truly beautiful place.
The list could go on and on.
No, you do not define who I am…no, I will never forgive the pain you made me experience..and no, I won’t apologize for being stronger than you.
I’ll forever be proud of the person you have driven me to be. After dealing with you, I know there is nothing I can’t handle.
Your worst nightmare